Lack and the Potato Mine: Conclusion

1 and a half russet potato with sprouts. Slice...

1 and a half russet potato with sprouts. Sliced (left) and whole (right). About 4 1/2 inches (11.5 cm) in length. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“I’ve been waiting for you to come down and answer the door for almost two months! What took so long? Also, you look familiar.” said Lack.

“So do you! Come inside.” said the stranger.

Lack clumsily enflopped himself from Hwoggenboggen’s piggish back to the tower’s front step and walked through the door. He found a shiny modern elevator of the sort that didn’t exist. The doors opened and the stranger led him in. The stranger clapped loudly six times and the doors opened again. Lack observed that he was now somewhere else (though he had felt no movement) and stepped out.

“Where are we?” he asked.

“The top floor.”

“Why didn’t it take two months?”

“It did. You just don’t remember. I have much to tell you.”

Then Wilhelm, for that was his name, proceeded to tell Lack much. 

Please do not read the previous sentence if you don’t want to know who the stranger is or why he is familiar. 

“I have been watching you since you arrived in the upper level of the Potato Mine. I can see what all the birds that have been following you see.  I know from the look on your face that you haven’t noticed them, which is unimportant. I have become very good at many things in all the years since I came here and spying on visitors is one of them. Talking is not. I haven’t introduced myself yet.

I am your long lost brother, Wilhelm. More accurately, you are my clone, made after I left.

I came here, just as you did, to escape lunchification by Mother and Father and to find a potato. Back then, we called them ‘Something that could change everything’, but I’ve always thought ‘potato’ sounded better.

Anyway, I failed. This tower has been my home now for the last 312 years and will continue to be so until someone finds a potato.

Unfortunately, it won’t be you because you are now under the same curse.”

“What curse?” asked Lack.

“The one that won’t let us go outside until someone finds a potato. Don’t worry, we will not age here, and we have an infinite supply of pigs to eat.” he replied.



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