Slonson and Bonson are not very bold
and one of them is very old
which one it is will not be told
in or out of the obstreperous wald.
Slonson and Bonson did bury the bear
who mauled the man with too much hair
Slonson and Bonson are common names
beneath the obstreperous wald.
- The Nine Types of Unusual Baby Names (appellationmountain.net)
- How to Overcome Uncertainty (celiaelaine.wordpress.com)
- Ancient Names for Herbs (witchesofthecraft.com)
- Ugly Words (wordcreatesplus.wordpress.com)
- One-of-a-Kind Baby Names (babyzone.com)
Once, when I lived in the Obstreperous Wald,
I knew a man who said he was bald
In fact, he had a lot of hair
And soon was mauled by Honesty Bear
It occurred to me while typing this (about 6 seconds ago) that someone reading this might think I am making some sort of Top 10 list of words. I have nothing against ranking lists, but I do not make them. It is almost, but not quite the same as cannibalism in that way. I refrain from these activities for different reasons, but you get the idea.
Back on topic, today’s word is ‘gespenst.’ I mentioned in an earlier post that I am very limited in my Japanese language skills. In comparison, I am nearly 100% lacking in comprehension and usage of German. I would not be able to use ‘gespenst’ in a sentence, but I do know what it means: ghost.
Ghosts, as you surely know, are considerably more awesome than you and I. I should not need to explain why, so I won’t. The problem here is that the word ‘ghost’ sounds kind of dull. Say it in German though and everything is better. The ‘s’s, I think, sound more like ‘sh’s, which combined with other consonants sound better than most things. Correct me if I’m wrong on that.
I learned of this amazing word from a Japanese video game, in which it was the name for a type of giant pilot-able robot. It looks like this:
I doubt that you are interested, but if you want to know more about the strategy role playing game series it is from, you can click here.
For the rest of you (who probably don’t exist), have a day and enjoy something.
This word has very narrow purpose and is not used in very many contexts other than medicine. This is a shame because it is such a beautiful word. Say it out loud to yourself and see if you agree. “PHLEBOTOMY.” If you work in a hospital, you can even say it in the presence of others, as long as you say it at the right time. What that time is should be more apparent to you than me. I don’t work in a hospital.
I know that many people are terrified of needles and having their blood drawn, to which I am sympathetic, but having a good reason to say this word should be enough to make up for it.
I also like to shorten it to ‘phleb’, which is a perfect exclamation for situations where ‘ham’ is too offensive. I don’t think the letters in phleb stand for anything, so I will fix that as soon as possible. Parakeet Heretic Laboriously Exasperating Brewery perhaps. I would put a single drop of my own blood in every keg. Did you know that alcoholic beverages are not required to list ingredients? This means I could make beer with human blood AND heretical pet birds (that are exasperated for some reason.)
I am not sure how many favorite words I am going to write about, but it’s a topic I like, so I’ll continue for now.
Blood Donation (Photo credit: Rojina)
This is a word in English again and a word shorter than the previous two. It has several meanings, but none of them are relevant to this post. I think it just sounds good even though it’s only one syllable. It also rhymes with many other words and is worth more than most 3-letter words in Scrabble and Words With Friends.
I have eaten the meat preparation called ‘ham‘ before and I lack a strong opinion on it. It can be very tasty if done right, but I can think of at least two other swine derived foods that are better. I can think of worse as well, with even less difficulty.
A ‘ham’ can also be a kind of person, which I think I am not. I don’t necessarily hate this kind of ham either, though I am much less likely to eat it. While I think cannibals should be free to practice their culinary traditions in peace, I choose not to join them.
After I started writing this, I googled the word and found another acronymical meaning that I did not previously know. Here it is. I’m not sure if this does or does not affect my enjoyment of the word. I might be able to form a more informed opinion if I knew exactly how hard a motherfucker is. Probably harder fluorite and softer than topaz, I’d guess.